You know, how there are some birthdays that really make you think about your life, well this sure is one of them. So, I'm 25 now, married, no kids, living here in New Orleans, and working for a contractor, feeling like I don't have much time or energy to do anything besides work and take care of my household and husband. But, what am I doing with my life? I mean, I graduated from college almost 3 years ago. I have my bachelors in Bible and Theology and I'm working for a contractor? What I am doing today, does it really matter? I mean, I still feel like I am trying to get off my feet from college. How long does it take to get out of this "transition" stage from college to life. I know that I am living life, but I don't really know what I am doing with life. Does that make sense? I mean, we are paying the bills, doing the "adult" thing, and in the eyes of American culture we are doing really well. But, Rob and I both know that where we are at in life right now is not the place we want to settle.
What does God have for us? Should we go overseas? Should we stay here and pursue working full time in a ministry down here in New Orleans? Or does God just want us to wait right where we are at? The older I get, the more God gives me a heart for overseas missions. But what does that mean? Does that mean that God wants us to be missionaries? Does that mean that God just wants us to promote awareness of what in going on in the global church to the American church? Or is God just working on my heart to mentally get me out of this American complacency I've been sitting in for the last 25 years? Does it mean that Rob and I need to make as much money and possible here so that we can send it overseas? The only answer I have right now: I don't know. I genuinely don't know. I have no clue where Rob and I will be in the next year. We very well could be doing the same exact thing we are doing right now, or we could be half-way around the world doing something completely different. I don't know. Questions. I have so many questions in my head right now, and not one answer. How's that for my 25th Birthday?
7 comments:
Those kind of questions don't have answers that come in a flash of insight or by careful study and research. They don't (usually) come even by prayer. They don't come in any way that allows you to plan your life. Those kind of questions have answers that come to you many years later when you look back and say, "Ah, that's what he was up to."
After reeading chip's comment I have this to say, God will not require something of you that is not in agreement with His call for Rob. God may not let both of you know at the same moment what He requires of you, but you will both agree on what God is saying to you. I think you saw becca's drawing of the 2 mules at our house. when we we married my grandmother told us that marriage is like a team of horses, as long as they both pull together they can get their work done and not be worn out at the end of the day. But since they are harnessed together if one pulls one way and the other in the opposite direction they end up working against each other and not getting any thing accomplished. It leads to seperation from God, but by pulling together and praying and talking over what each of you think that you are hearing from the Lord, then you will have a clear call from Him as to His will for both of you. Love & prayers from Gramps
I have to say I know exactly what you mean. Sounds like the same questions I was asking myself a couple of years ago. I will pray that God reveals His answers and whatever they are, you'll be sure that it is His direction and be completely fulfilled and at peace with them.
Hey Christina! I really enjoy reading your blogs.. Feel like I still know what's going on in your life even though we don't get to see each other. I totally agree with the whole "Getting Older" thing. I know that this summer I will be in NZ, but I will wonder about when I get back and where's my life going to go. Will I be called into full time minitry forever or is this just a temp. oppertunity. I also wonder about getting married. I know that their's someone special out there for me, God is just waiting for the right time. My parents keep praying that i'll meet him while in NZ. HA! Anyway, I will be home at the end of April and can't wait to see y'all!
Hey Christina! I don't know if you remember me- I was Sara Nave back in Moody days! I'm Sara Fisher now and live in South Georgia (I'm from Michigan) with my husband who's an Army chaplain. I just checked my old email address and found the link here!
As far as your situation, I competely understand! Even being in "the ministry" per se as a chaplain, we are constantly asking ourselves if we should be overseas. We, too, have a passion for it, and I have asked myself the same questions as you many times.
Unfortunately, I don't have an answer for you. I don't personally believe that God has one "will" for each of our lives and we're out on a hunt to find it. Is what you're doing glorifying to Him? Do you enjoy it? There are so many pros and cons on both sides, I know. I guess the biggest thing I have learned is that, even if in a year I am not where I am now, I need to be careful to not wish away this time and miss ministry that I COULD have here.
I enjoyed your blog so much- check out mine! :-)
Hey girl! As I was reading your latest entry, I thought of something that a friend shared with me 2 days ago. Waiting on God is HARD but NECESSARY! We live in a world that wants everything "right now", including all the answers to life. As a result, we've forgotten how to wait. It's not just a good idea...God requires it of us. Either we believe that He's really in control of our lives, or we don't! There's no "in-between" on this one. Often in those moments when we find ourselves wanting so badly to push forward, those are the moments that we really need to work on the whole "Be still and know that I am God" thing :)
You must be busy...no post since February!! :-)
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